Which paradox are we talking about?
A coaching paradox
Per my online dictionary definition, a paradox is a seemingly absurd or contradictory statement or proposition that may prove to be true when investigated.
In a blog post, Seth Godin starts by saying that "at the top tier of just about any sort of endeavour, you'll find that the performers have coaches... And yet, in the world of business, they're seen as the exception." Seth's paradox is that the very things:
Talking about our challenges
Setting goals
Acknowledging we can get better
that hold us back are the reasons people need a coach in the first place, and that is the paradox.
I agree, but I think there is something else too, another paradox perhaps. Successful business people do have coaches (why else would the global revenue from coaching now be estimated at $15BN, more than 6x increase from 2015), but they are in the main uncomfortable sharing their experiences. Specifically how coaching is helping them to up their game and to become even more successful. I wrote about the need to get more executives to talk about the benefits of being coached in my article "The First Rule of Fight Club: You do not talk about Fight Club" in 2020. By not talking about not being perfect and receiving support to overcome obstacles and challenges that executives are facing, we could be adding to the levels of stress and anxiety in the modern workplace. Expectations build-up, and false impressions are made that the finished, polished and perfect products we see are the first and only drafts. The many hours and numerous iterations that weren't fit to be shared are hidden from sight. Like the swan that gracefully moves on a lake, a picture of elegance in motion, yet underneath the water's surface and hidden from view, there is frantic kicking going on that is churning up the muddy, murky water.
Whether that is a paradox or not isn't the point. We need lived experiences of working with coaches shared so that coaching in the business world isn't seen as the exception but normalised and interpreted not as a sign of weakness but as a sign of strength.
To help people who may be interested but still undecided about working with a coach, I wrote this article, "Everything you need to know about executive coaching".
And I always request feedback and a written testimonial at the end of each coaching engagement. A testimonial will help people to gain a sense of the experience of working with me. These lived experiences are the reason I do what I do.
"I never cease to be amazed by his consistent energy. He has a real passion for helping people develop everything from dealing with a tricky conversation to making major life-impacting decisions. Rob asks the difficult questions and, in return, expects some real focus and thinking to unearth both challenges and opportunities. Through working with Rob, I've crystallised some emerging ideas about my future career and feel like I have a much clearer sense of direction. Through the application of some tools and approaches, I understand the framework of my motivations and drivers much more holistically. Rob is a wonderful listener, and I felt he really navigated through our sessions in a way that focused on helping me develop a longer-term strategy whilst responding to situations and events as they occurred."
Get in touch to learn more and book a no-obligation introductory call to discover how I may help you, your team, and your business.
📫 - Favourite quote
This month I am sharing a definition, not a quote:
Integrity is:
Doing what I say I will do when I say I will do it, in the expected way.
And if I can't get it done, then I have to clean up my mess, be responsible for that mess, and then set new conditions for satisfaction.
Does your team or business operate consistently with that definition and so act with integrity?
🧐 - Newly discovered content of interest
A must-read for anyone who agrees with the answer to the following question.
"What's worse than missing a meeting? Attending one."
Sick of Zoom meetings? The otter.ai is an app that takes notes at virtual and hybrid meetings - and maybe even attends for you.
🧾 - An absorbing and insightful (short) read
Genghis Khan and the Making of the Modern World. Considering the scale of the period of time covered and the size of the Mongol empire, this book is wonderfully snappy at 270 pages long. There were many insights and lessons to take away from this book pertaining to modern-day leadership. It is also a powerful reminder to study history to avoid repeating mistakes of the past. Unfortunately, those leaders who study and learn from history may still have to observe those who don't... COVID-19 in 2020 compared with The Black Death in the 1300s is one very relevant example.
⚖ - If you did have the answer, what would it be?
Perhaps the following will help:
Do you need a new perspective on a challenge you're struggling with?
Are you starting a new role and want to make a positive impact and quickly establish credibility?
My latest article is here - "The best way to deal with delusional people at work".
The RYSE Journal - "Headspace for professional development".
Please keep your comments and feedback coming in. Even if it is a quick email to say hi for the first time in a while.
Rob